NSO... p1

Today I sat in a room full of new staff members for New Staff Orientation (NSO). Not as a newbie staff member but as a veteran, a presenter of content, a mentor helping launch them in their new careers at LCBC Church well.

Why was I chosen from among the amazing group I get to call peers to represent them? Well, its not because I'm a shining example of what to be, actually, I'm quite the opposite, I've made a LOT of mistakes over the past 13 years.  

Pearl and I've been around LCBC since 2005, we were only 22 then! We were like babies! We'd been married only 3 months. Still in the midst of our own spiritual crisis of faith, not fully sure of what we believed or where we belonged, but somehow landed a spot on the staff of a church that had just exploded, and doubled... again. 

I didn't feel like I belonged, I was a redneck colorblind kid from Georgia with a speech impediment. 

But God wanted us to belong, but more importantly he wanted us to become something. 

The past 13 years on staff have radically changed me. Reshaped my marriage, how I parent, how I believe and pray and value and close my eyes at night in peace. 

The past 13 years have drug me through some awful seasons of growth and refinement. Seasons of anxiety and panic attacks, of looking at the brink of finical ruin (or what felt like ruin), of questioning my value and belonging and worth and place and skills and all the questions that haunt closet insecurity addicts. 

But the past 13 years have also propelled me literally around the world, 9 countries to be exact (if you count airports, which I totally do). It's thrust me into a deeper understanding of myself, my talents, my value, my faith, God's acceptance and ridiculous love of me, teaching me what leadership is but more importantly what faithfulness is, faithfulness to servant leadership in a community and faithfulness to teammate, friends... and my spouse.  

The past 13 years have been simply amazing. I'm truly honored, blessed, humbled to have these memories, to be apart of these moments, to have LCBC as a part of me and to say I'm a part of LCBC. 

So why did I present today? Maybe just to remind myself, and hopefully a room full of wide eyed newbie's that God has a wild plan for our lives that we could never map out, but we can follow one step at a time, and in so following be invited into the wonderful adventure of his kingdom and our becoming fully who he's created us to be. 

Here's to hopefully another 13 years... well, that is if that's where God's map might lead... which I hope it does! 

worth it...

So this past weekend I found myself looking into Pearl's eyes with excitement, intrigue, bewilderment, but also a sense that I had arrived and saying....

..."I've found my people!"

Now if that's true or not, I don't know, but what I do know is that as I walked with my family towards the cyclocross race this past Saturday and the DJ made the air electric and the bikes whirled by, and the people had a care free spirit of "all's welcome here" and I wanted more.

Like make you stay up late looking to buy a bike and go to races this weekend more. Not sure exactly what bug I've caught but something caught me and I want more of it.

Will this last beyond this weekend? I honestly don't know. But I do know this past weekend was fun, like stupid, cry from laughing, heart explode fun.

There was something about the energy of the race, the joy of the boys, the crispiness of the fall air... something that just made it a great weekend.

So will I be going to a race next month? Not sure, but this weekend was worth it.

Worth being intentional to get outside of my bubble.

Worth choosing to work at a coffee house instead of the office.

Worth pausing from emails long enough to notice the folks around me.

Worth making eye contact with the biker rolling in for a morning cup of joe before starting his ride.

Worth swapping cell numbers.

Worth connecting over coffee again later to get to know him more.

Worth taking him up on an invitation to experience this wild-fun-world that he calls home.

Am I now a cyclocross racer? Not sure, but this weekend was fun.

But what I do know I am, is a follower of Jesus. What I do know I do each weekend, is gather with friends at church and sing, and clap, and be inspired, and drink coffee, and love every minute of being there.

So, will I be at a cyclocross next month? Not sure. But will I be at church, absolutely.

So a text and an invite with a stranger, leading to coffee, leading to a race, leading to an awesome experience was worth it, and I we approach Thanksgiving, Baptism, and Christmas, I can't wait to extend the same simple invite to my friends and who knows, they may just love church as much as I loved the race.

So it's been a while...

So it's been a while....  like 3 years been a while. 

I'm not even sure if "blogging" is the thing to do these days. 

I'm sure there's a hipper, cooler, slicker way to be present on the ol' inter-web. But honestly social media isn't hacking it for me these days, I just deleted my instagram account, but there's always been something about words and ideas on a screen that's attracted me. 

So here's to coming back to an old love, to expressing one's thoughts for others to engage but more importantly to the practice of pausing long enough to reflect on the day's passings. 

I find myself sitting alone in my living room. Pearl and the boys are snuggled in bed, resting and hopefully dreaming of sugar plums and what not (can you tell I'm listening to Christmas music while typing). 

It's funny to me how old loves cycle back. I find myself rediscovering a love for words, photography, storytelling, frisbee golf, coffee, bikes, and randomly my college guitar, on which I can still only play the same 4 chords I learned in a moldy dorm room years ago. 

Old loves, things we allow life to distract us from, to take for granted, and slowly fade out of our routines. Only to "rediscover" and re-fall in love with all over again. 

It's fun to do that with hobbies and objects, but not with people, especially people who matter... people like your wife and kids. 

It's been a busy season for Pearl and I. She just started full time again since going part time to start our family. We're having to split chores again, juggle carpool and pick up, figure out who's work meeting takes precedent, squeeze in work outs to keep from growing out as we grow old and all the while remembering it's the people who matter most in our lives, people like our boys, our families, each other. 

So here's to not letting those that matter most drift into "old loves" but to stay fresh and present and front in center in this whirlwind of life. To refuse to allow the slow fade of the mundane hustle and bustle of life to lull us from keeping those who matter most, most important. 

So as I rediscover an old love of blogging, may I never need to rediscover the love of my boys, my bride, or my family.