a moment with a perfectionist friend.

I recently was talking with a friend who may or may not remind you of one of yours.

This guy is brilliant, hardworking, a great father and a loving husband, but he's also one of the greatest perfectionist I've ever met.

Like annoyingly perfectionist. Like he's got his budget tight, his debt responsible, he beard trimmed and his car vacuumed.

You know the type I'm talking about.

For all intensive purposes I'm jealous of how well he's got his life together.

But while hanging out recently he shared how his perfectionism is also a curse.

He said at any moment, for almost any subject, there's a voice whispering in his ear, like a devil on his shoulder, pointing out all his faults,

all the ways he might have screwed up,

might have crossed a line,

might have intentionally sinned or

intentionally did something that might hurt someone or

be seen as bad or

that might prove he's actually a horrible person and the entire world is gonna find out at any moment.

As he shared this my heart broke for him.

I told him therapist are amazing and he might need to check one out, and that I've loved mine.

But then the conversation turned to the role of the accuser on our shoulder, the one who's whispering the shame in our ear.

And these whispers come whether we're a perfectionist or not.

We all know that voice. The voice that reminds us of that moment we...

Said that,
Looked there,
Reacted that way,
Intentionally didn't do,
Intentionally did do.

The accuser doesn't care really what it is we did or didn't do, he simply hates us, well, not really us, he hates Jesus and which means he hates everything Jesus loves, which means he hates us, cause Jesus loves us.

Jesus loves us like crazy, so the accuser, he hates us like crazy.

So in that hate, he'll take every action we've done or not done and twist it and taint it and turn it so that it becomes a dagger for our heart, our confidence, our peace, our joy.

His hate is creative and vindictive and exhausting.

But here's what shuts up the accuser.

IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW ACCURATE THE ACCUSATIONS ARE, GRACE FORGIVES US. 

Think about that. Let that sink in.

It honestly doesn't matter if what the accuser is whispering is true or false, it doesn't matter if you're really a terrible person or not, or if you did that "thing" on purpose or not, or whether you're a good person or bad, the point of Jesus, his grace, his love, is to say we're loved period, chosen period, redeemed period and his love SHUTS THE ACCUSER UP!

So the next time the whispers come and shame seeps in, and the accuser is casting his accusations, tell him to shut up, cause grace forgives, grace covers, and it doesn't matter if you are or aren't what he's throwing in your face.

Grace wins, you're loved, and Jesus said you're enough for him, whether your life appears perfect or whether your life is a perfect mess.

Matthew 13:12

"For whoever has, to him more shall be given, and he will have an abundance; but whoever does not have, even what he has shall be taken away from him."

Some days it feels like life is smooth sailing, other days it feels like you're grasping for dear life in the bed of a truck hauling down a potted dirt road driven by a adolescent want-a-be stunt driver convinced he could run with the Dukes of Hazard, (haven't we all had a moment like that or is that just a North Georgia mountain childhood thing?).

I've been around people who it seems like no matter how much is thrown their way they still have a smile on their face, something to say thank you for, and an odd grace to keep sailing smoothly through the rough waters. While others are basically riding unicorns and drinking rainbows and yet are as sour and jaded as possible.

So what gives?

I once believed Matthew 13:12 was an unfair verse. That God was saying he'd bless the bless and keep cursing the curse. Like he walked around given out extra ice cream cones to the popular kids and an extra cosmic kick to the stomach to the rejects.

But in college someone in passing said this isn't about God's behavior but ours. That it's more about how the person who see's all the good things they've got in life starts noticing more and more good things. And the one who only sees what they don't have, seems to grow in their list of lacks and wants and should haves and why nots.

Its like once you start seeing the glass half full it just keeps filling, but when you start to see it half empty, it just keeps emptying.

But, at first glance that doesn't seem to be what Jesus was getting at here.  When I first read it, it was like Jesus was talking more about how to understand more things and how to be more biblically astute. I felt like I was being told how to out bible the bible scholars.

But Jesus didn't really seem to care to much about making us smarter, but he did seemed to care a whole LOT about us being freed to live a new kind of life. A life that's good and true and free from brokenness and corruption. A life that becomes marked by love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

So I wonder if what Jesus was getting at that day with his disciples was want my friend in college was talking about. That when we chose to live our lives looking for the life marked by the way of Jesus, then we start to see evidence of the way of Jesus all around us. But when we give into the undertow of the world and we start focusing on all the hurt and pain and junk around us, it's like we slowly drown in our fear, pessimism and hate.

I don't know about you, but I don't want to live a naive life, or ignorant life, I don't want to live life like I watched the movie IT as a kid, with my fingers in my ears, eyes closed, singing through most of it. But I do want to live a hopeful life.

I want to live a life that has eyes to see and ears that hear the glimpses of the Jesus kind of life breaking into our world all around us.

A life that even in the darkest of times and worst of moments can still find the good.

I want to be quick to see, identify and point out the glimpses of Heaven on earth even in the midst of Hell breaking loose.

Seeing and pointing out,
The Good things.
The Great things.
The Hopeful things.
The Joyful things.
The moments where the sliver linings of life present a beautiful expectancy of Jesus making all things new, and all things right.

The world doesn't need help seeing the hurt and the pain. We've got four thousand News channels and now for the first time in history a smart phone with access to the global conversation in the hands of everyone inviting us to point out and highlight and declare every little ugly moment of life happening around us.

If you need to see hurt and pain, go to Facebook, but where are our hope tellers, our joy bringers, our storytellers who highlight how everything isn't hopeless and burning to the ground. But that our children can have a good world to one day call their own and that we don't have to cower in fear declaring the best days as yesterdays but that there's hope on the horizon, joy all around, and good to be had.

I want the abundant life Jesus talked about. I want more and more and more and more of the good life. And I pray that as my cup fills up, it fills up those around me and so on and so on until the little world around me, isn't a half empty pit of despair but a group that's overflowing with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control not for our selfish enjoyment but for the benefit and enjoyment of everyone around us.

So may we start today. May we start pushing to see the good, the right, the true, even where social media and the news is screaming and complaining about the bad. May we look for sliver lining and the hope, not in a fake annoyingly optimistic way but in an honest life giving, hope restoring redeeming way.

So here's to seeing the good, to filling up with the Jesus kind of life and to being ready to be a light even in the darkness of moments.